Dad in 1979

Dad is his classroom with students in 1979. He taught English at Benjamin Franklin High School in East Harlem, specializing in students who never learned to read.

We found this picture along with a cigar box of letters my mother wrote to Dad in 1968. I thought about reading them to him, but then I thought they might remind him that she's dead and make him sad. He once asked me about her and I had to go over the whole thing with him - cancer, the hospital, her death. It was excruciating.

By any other name . . .

Dad re-named Brianna! All yesterday, whenever he couldn't find her, he'd say, "where's senor?"!!! We'd say, "she's in the bathroom" or whatever and Kate S. even tried to convince him to call her "Senorita" instead, but "Senor" stuck. It's kind of awkward, even though I"m pretty sure he's not doing it because she's trans, but because his whole concept of gender and language is screwball. He often calls Kate S. "the big fellow" and, of course, his housekeeper, Marie, is a woman, but he named her after Obama, a man.

In general, Dad's language is pretty unpredictable. Yesterday, he wanted to know what something was, so Kate S. told him "cheese" and he seemed blank. Then I yelled "Queso" from the kitchen where I was cooking, hoping that the part of his brain that spent months at a time in Latin America would kick in. Nothing. Then she said "Fromage" and Dad said "Oh, cheese," in a why-didn't-you-say-so tone! I guess the translation required a different part of his brain than just simply recognizing the word.

Sometimes it's like solving riddles - yesterday he was looking for something, and when I asked him what, he said "It came three months before, and it predicted anything, and then it came true" - say what? - but after thinking for a moment, I realized he meant the Obama hat!!! It "predicted" Obama's election which "came true".

Note to self: when Dad is looking for something it is likely to be:

a) the Obama hat
b) a napkin
c) his glasses
d) a beverage
e) his wallet

12/27/08

Brianna went to see Dad today, since I have a crazy cough - he gets really scared if he finds out that I'm sick, even if it's just a cold, he gets convinced that I'm going to die and he says, "If you go, I go." They had Japanese food, and Brianna says he said "I don't like raw fish," which is odd since he has eaten - and enjoyed - sushi in the past. But in the last few years, his palate seems to have changed a lot - he was never that big on sweet things, but now he loves desserts. He's also started drinking tea, in addition to his ubiquitous coffee.

Christmas 2008

Memory is so random - today Dad asked me "where's the doorknob?" while feeling the opposite wall (which doesn't have a door), but when christmas carols come on the radio, he can sing along - those words are deep in there, I guess - even though he stopped singing after an insensitive elementary school teacher told him to just mouth the words. After about 80 years, that blow has finally softened and now he sings.

Note to self: check the humidor for missing wallets. That's where we found it today.

Accidentally discovered a cheap source of entertainment for Dad - I showed him how to pop the bubbles in bubble wrap and he sat there for a long time, each pop followed with a satisfied "got it!". He puzzled over the ones that wouldn't pop for a while, and then said "there just isn't enough air in them" - I was amazed that he figured that out.